If you’re not much of a worker or even a decent human being. Here is a huge opportunity for you to get ahead of the game. Clown’s for Coworkers.

A guy at work made the comment that he really enjoyed working with me and what a nice guy I was despite how much shit my coworkers talk about me.

I smiled a bit flattered, I guess and thanked him.

He reiterated that they talked a lot of shit about me and if I was aware. I am well aware and do not have the slightest problem with this in the least.

You see, people that are nothing, accomplish nothing, sabotage their so called “friends” to win the majorities liking. Only care about themselves. Who would and have screwed over their own families to screw over a coworker.

These people mean absolutely zero to me and always will.

So I want to start a new business called “Clown’s for Coworkers”.

At Clown’s for Coworkers, we believe that everyone should be happy.

If you feel you need to trash talk me to feel better about yourself. Then go for it. I am your clown.

If telling everyone I’m lazy helps them overlook your laziness. I’m here to help. If putting me down puts you on top of the world. Gimme a call. If you want to claim I ripped off your recipes from you. Feel free to leave nasty comments below. I encourage it. In fact, nothing would make me happier.

Putting people down is the new self esteem.

Drag my name through the mud. Go ahead! Feel good about yourself.

You deserve it. You are entitled to look amazing. I mean, after all. You showed up didn’t you? Well then goddamn it. You deserve to be rewarded.

We are here to make you look awesome.

Don’t you worry about learning a skill, being a decent person, doing your actual job, perfecting your craft or treating people like your want to be treated.

At Clown’s for Coworkers we say – “Fuck that!”

Treat people like shit. Trash talk them, that way you look like a bad ass. Fuck people over so they fail and then tell everyone how bad they suck at life.

Hey, as long as you made out and came out on top? Who gives a shit who you fucked over. That’s what we say.

Going to a party and need to look good? I can send some of my fat friends (most likely they’ll be family) so you look dynamite.

Got a job you’re not proud of? Let me send David the Clown. He’ll be whatever you think is beneath you. Hang out with David and put his job down. Makes you and your job look important.

Imagine all the respect you’ll get.

By the way, tipping is frowned upon. We know at Clown’s for Coworkers douchebags like you don’t tip anyway.

We’ll be waiting for your email you piece of shit….uh, we mean, you one hell of a great guy!!

A big thank you to BROTEstudio for the killer clown picture! 

Being courageous does not mean never being sacred; it means acting as you know you must even though you are undeniably afraid. – Desmond Tutu

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