Miscellany

To lie or tell the truth?

 

One of the hardest things for us, is to tell the truth. It’s the hardest yet the most liberating. You would think that being honest and telling the truth when asked would be the easiest thing. Sadly, far from it.

The truth will set you free. The truth can also make you look like an asshole.

I understand why this is so. You learn from a young age that telling the truth could get you in trouble and punished. You learn as a teenager that telling the truth gets you judged and labeled. Then you learn as an adult, telling the truth gets you all those things. Possibly even fired. We eventually learn to bullshit because we learned that telling the truth gets us in trouble, judged and labeled.

You see liars and scammers get away with things that blow your mind, while someone who was honest and upfront lost their jobs, relationship, family or even more. I’ve witnessed it and it’s mind boggling.

I think we have all been there, where telling the truth will make us look like the biggest asshole ever. That’s the hardest time to tell the truth. So in defense of our ego we come up with some bullshit lie. But then lying makes you look like an even bigger asshole. So what was accomplished?

You and a friend don’t speak anymore and someone asks you why. Are you going to tell the truth and say, “Man, I really fucked him over and now he won’t speak to me.” No. No you won’t and no one has ever. You’ll play like you don’t know or come up with some pathetic lie. No way do you want to look like a bad guy. The truth is so hard to say. It makes you look vulnerable and weak. I’ve lied by showing hatred towards someone I actually liked. This makes no sense at all but lying was easier.

I don’t think people lie maliciously, unless you’re just a downright dirt ball. I think people lie to protect their image. Their feelings. Peoples egos are fragile, regardless of what they say. We all have a heart and get hurt. It’s just the way life goes.

I had a “friend” tell some gruesome lies about me that were absurd and just absolutely beyond fabricated. The unfortunate thing about lying is people knew the truth of the matter anyway. So what did lying accomplish, when their actions spoke the truth a million times louder than any lie could have ever covered up?

We are all human and we all make mistakes. Telling the truth would reveal your strength and courage. It would protect your image more than any lie. We all stumble and fall. I have been there. I have lost some great friendships that still bother me to this day. Is it unfortunate? You bet. Would I lie to make them look like the bad guy? Absolutely not. It’s not fair to them and it certainly wouldn’t help matters if I were ever hoping to be friends again.

I stumbled and fell. I fucked up. I’m sorry.

“Tell the truth boldly, whether it hurts or not.  Never pander to weakness.  If truth is too much for intelligent people and sweeps them away, let them go; the sooner the better.” – Swami Vivekanada 

 

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2 Comments

  1. Anonymous says

    Was just discussing this exact same subject with a friend today. It’s rare for anyone to be honest and truthful anymore. I think it’s because so many people live fake lives via social networking, that they don’t even know the difference between what they pretend to be and what is reality! And heaven forbid should you call someone out on their bullsh*t. Instead of being truthful, they turn it around on you and make you look like the bad guy. Trust me, I know all too well. There are 3 types of people that I have no patience and/or time for, and LIARS are one of them! Speak to me the truth, or don’t speak to me at all. It’s that simple.

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